Maria is a person I've had multiple interactions with though never developed a close friendship. I know she loves my nieces and nephew. I know she would always come to help my sister when she needed her because Maria values family.
I've always had a soft spot for Maria. Everyone who meets her has a soft spot for Maria.
Maria grew up in a third world country where her culture taught her that she wasn't as valuable as a son. She learned that there were very few jobs or roles in life that she was qualified for because of her gender. I suspect she didn't sit around as a little girl and dream about being a doctor or a journalist or an artist. Growing up in a communist and then post communist country in the mid to late 20th century was a lot different than my upbringing in 90s America.
Maria was abused in her past. No one has ever obtained exact details about what happened to her but at least one instance of gang rape is suspected. Again, this happened in a culture where women are not only blamed for being a victim but where it's often overlooked because the shame of not being a virgin is greater than the shame (or lack thereof) of being a rapist.
Maria came to live in America illegally with some of her legal relatives. She never married. She worked in the different family businesses and helped everyone with raising their children, including my sister's children.
Some years ago she was diagnosed with cancer. She has always refused treatment except a few surgeries.
And now she is dying.
She was able to make it back to her mother in Eastern Europe and she is in a lot of pain. They don't have hospice or a place for the dying in her country. They are refusing her morphine at this point but from what I'm told, she could really use it. Would you please, reader, just say a prayer in your heart right now that she would be given some comfort and pain relief in this time?
Heaven knows she hasn't received a lot of that throughout her life.
I know that in death she will find relief. In the arms of the one person who can love us the right way, she will find that acceptance and value that it seems she was never able to feel in life.
Maria is only one of many.
We live in a world where very few women live in cultures where they are valued and respected the right way. Even in my desire to be tolerant and loving, respecting different points of view, I would argue that there is a right way. No woman should get a cancer diagnosis at such a young age and feel there is nothing worth her living for and so refuse treatment, resigning herself to her death.
Every little girl should be protected and loved and grow up with dreams. Every little girl should be told that she has a purpose and a calling and be given the resources and opportunities to find out what that is.
But many little girls are not. Maria was one of those little girls.
Say a prayer for Maria at the end of her life.
Be moved to help those who still have time left.
No comments:
Post a Comment